Teddy Graves: Gamut
After experiencing a life-altering trauma in 2022, artist Teddy Graves turned to art as a means of processing pain and reclaiming identity. Through powerful self-portraits and a mix of acrylic and digital media, Graves explores themes of depression, insecurity, and healing. This exhibit invites viewers to witness the journey and discover the transformative power of art.
Can you guide us through the emotional progression of the exhibition? What do you hope viewers take away from this journey?
This exhibit starts at my lowest point and progressively gets happier; each step in the healing process is actually color coded. Jester is grey, symbolizing emotional numbness. Then, the paintings are orange/red, symbolizing anger, resentment, and hatred. Solitude is purple, symbolizing acceptance and a shift in mindset. Then the paintings are blue, symbolizing moving on and allowing myself to be happy again. Family Portrait is green, symbolizing contentment in the life I’ve so painstakingly built. I really hope that other victims of assault can see this progression and know that it does get better. It just takes time.
Can you describe the moment you decided to pick up art again after your traumatic experience?
I was sitting in the upstairs studio in Turner, working on my final painting for my Intro to Studio Practice class. It was really late in the night to be painting, something like 10 o’clock, and I couldn’t stop thinking about how I didn’t want DPS to come and kick me out of the building. That’s when I realized that I was actually enjoying painting again, for the first time in about a year and a half. That painting is now I’m Only Sleeping.
Are there any specific pieces in the exhibit that hold the most personal significance to you?
Pulp Riot means a lot to me. It was a really significant turning point for me to dye my hair blue again. It sounds silly, but in my head, being able to reclaim my hair meant that I was starting to get better. I really loved my hair when it was blue the first time and I wanted it back so badly, but I couldn’t see past what happened. My boyfriend, Calob, helped me with the whole process of re-dying it blue; in fact, he took the reference picture for the painting. He wiped my tears and listened to my worries. He really made it a healing process; there’s nothing like the man you love helping you become your happiest self.
Many of your works are self-portraits. How do you use self-portraiture to explore and convey your mental health journey?
I use self-portraiture as another level of personality in my works. It’s one thing to paint something and have a ton of symbolism that is so personal and have this super personal story behind it, and it's another to have your literal face in the painting. I use my likeness to show that it’s my journey and portray how personal my healing was.
What role does the small-town environment where you were raised play in shaping your artistic voice?
Where I’m from, it’s not very popular to be an artist. If you are, there is a strong emphasis on making “pretty” art that you don’t have to think much about. I started off making “pretty” art, but after moving to Hot Springs, AR for my junior and senior year of high school, I was exposed to and started making art with more complex meanings. I felt constricted by the small town expectations of artists and, like the rebellious teenager I was, made the opposite of what they would like for a while. I made some really weird and out there stuff. I eventually leveled out and have found a good balance between “pretty” and “weird.”
How do you hope your art impacts those who may have experienced similar trauma or struggles?
I hope that other victims can feel seen and less alone. I want my art to give them hope. It feels incredibly lonely and isolating to go through what I went through; I want others to see my art and read my story and know that I get it. I also want them to see how I’ve gotten better and grown and know that they can too. It’s hard and it takes a long time, but you get through it.
Gamut is on display at the Meadows Museum from January 12 - February 14, 2025.